Did you hear paying taxes is patriotic? I recently bought Lego Indiana Jones for the Wii and paying $3.00 in taxes in was like a celebrating the Fourth of July all over again. It took every bit of my self control not burst out singing ‘God Bless America.’ Then on Friday I looked at my paycheck stub. Hell, I might as well have been drapped in the flag and launching fireworks out my ass. It really was a beautiful moment. And while I am just content unwillingly letting the government fleece me out of money, some of our greatest Americans are begging Uncle Sam to take more:
‘This November, vote American. Vote imagination. Vote hope. Vote your conscience. Vote for the troops. Vote to make me pay higher taxes. (I owe it to your children and my own.) Vote to put your country first.’ – Sean Penn
Ah yes. Vote to raise taxes, because obviously the public can’t be trusted to wisely invest the money. Here is Sean Penn literally crying out for the government to come and take his money but tragically he is still rich. What the hell does a person have do to give away their money in this nation? Oh wait, he could just…give…away…his money. Just brainstorming here, but how about starting a few charities Sean if you have too much money weighing down your conscience. Like maybe the ‘Sean Penn Centre for Rich Celebrities That Feel Guilty For Making Millions of Dollar While Starring In Horrible Movies.’ Or how about having your accountant ease back on all the deductions while he/she is filling out your tax forms? Paying more taxes isn’t actually the most difficult thing to do, Sean. Only Hollywood could screw up something so simple.